If you’ve ever been in love, and you think about it, you will probably agree that love has physical sensations to it: the butterflies in the stomach, the overwhelming feeling of warmth. These are not unusual. They are also very normal.

What blows me away is that, after nearly 3 years, Master Bennet can still produce these feelings in me, sometimes at unexpected times. I will be walking down the street, and I’m hit by a wave of emotion and the physical sensation of love. I take this as a sign of how deeply engrained in me Master is. Perhaps those feelings come from within, rather than without. Perhaps they are the result of the seed he has planted deep within my soul.

You still got it, Master.

“Command is for captains and generals. I have no interest in command. If you would obey, you will discern what pleases me, and do it unasked."

When I received the above quote this morning, I was at first concerned. Was Master chastising me? Had I displeased him?

I love to be commanded, or told to do some things, it is true. I think sometimes Master tells me what to do (like helping me pick out what to wear) simply to humor me. He knows I enjoy it, so he gave me his opinion. But then I thought about it.

I have written often about WWBD? (What Would Bennet Do?) I have been struck by that several times in the days since he left. I have tried to make decisions based on what he would want. Isn’t that the point of the above quote? “If you would obey, you will discern what pleases me, and do it unasked.”

There may be times when I do not know what Master wants, or when I guess wrong as to his wishes. I believe Master understands that. This is a learning process, after all. The point is that I try, each time, to obey, whether he has given me specific instructions or not.

May I always obey you and be pleasing to you, Master.

Master often gives me books and DVDs. We watched some of his favorite shows together. Why? Why should I read what he reads, watch what he watches?

There is a very good reason. I can learn more about Master Bennet, the man, by examining what he reads, what he watches, what he enjoys. I wish to understand him as completely as possible. This will allow me to serve him better. He, in turn, understands me better through these posts. It is all a part of U/us growing and becoming more as O/one.

This does not mean that I have to like or agree with everything he enjoys. The goal is not to become Master, but to see his point of view and to be cognizant of his perspective.

Today I will begin reading the book A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole. What will I learn about Master today?

I have heard it said that milk is nature’s most nearly perfect food, since it contains pretty much all of the nutrients one needs to survive. I would like to submit that while milk is close, there is another snack that is perfect for our super-sized society.

TITS

That’s right, tits. They contain no fat of any kind to clog your arteries. There is no sugar to raise your blood sugar; no calories at all for the diet conscience. There is no sodium to raise your blood pressure. No carcinogens threaten your health.

Judging by how much Master enjoyed them, the taste must be pretty good, too.

Free food! Eat all you want! *

*This offer applies to Master Bennet only.

I had the chance to go to two parties Sunday night: my son’s 4H group had a picnic, and the neighbors had a block party. Since Master has left, I didn’t real feel like going, especially since he couldn’t go with me. But, What Would Bennet Do? Master would want me to go and socialize. He doesn’t think I do enough of that. Besides, I said no more moping around.

I went to the 4H picnic. I must admit that the conversation seemed a bit…slow. What Would Bennet Do? Master Bennet would engage in conversation and liven things up. He wouldn’t sit around and be bored. Well, I’m not always that great a conversationalist, unless I happen to stumble upon a topic that particularly interests me. But I stuck it out, listening to one group, then another. Eventually the talk turned to the county fair. Again, I didn’t contribute a lot, but at least it was more interesting.

I did talk to the head of the county 4H. I had declined to do the dog training this year because I had been so busy. She had not gotten anyone else to do it, so I am going to work with the kids a little before the fair. I felt so guilty for pulling out. I now have a little more time, and I have promised myself that I will work on building up the program well before next year. I’m afraid I let it get away from me this year as I focused on other things: the end of the school year, concern about the change in job assignments for next year, Master’s visit, etc. I am not proud that I let the dog program slide. I am sure I didn’t make Master proud, either. The best I can do now is help the kids as much as possible this year and prepare AHEAD OF TIME for next year. The 4H leader was very understanding.

I didn’t make it to the block party. Things seemed to be winding down by the time we got back, but once or twice I was told that I was missed. They are talking about having another one. Perhaps I can make that one.

It would be nice if I could introduce Master. But the best I can do is go and make him proud.